Empathy — the currency of bias?
We’re born racist. We are racist. We should accept that we’re racist. Here’s how empathy is part of the problem but also the answer.
“Left to our own devices and prejudices, we instinctively prefer our own kind. Why do we have such careful criteria and protocols for professional job interviews? To correct this unconscious bias. My view is that we should openly accept this trait, the better to tackle it.” — Peter Bazalgette, Author of ‘The Empathy Instinct’
(EDIT — Since publishing I’ve had a few conversations with others disagreeing with me on the choice of the subtitle — that we’re born racist. I should clarify here that I do not mean we come out of the womb slighting another because of the colour of their skin but I am arguing that if racism is man-made, where did it come from in the first place? Many agree we’re tribal, I’m stating here that our default position of preferential treatment of others like ourselves is the root of prejudice and therefore the root of racism. Like all things though, the balance of nature and nurture is often what causes the extremes. But by making the uncomfortable decision to acknowledge our nature, we also make the better decision to positively nurture the next generation of empathic citizens.)
Empathy fascinates me. Particularly how other people view and define empathy. Often it’s used as a blanket statement for everything good, we assume ‘being in someone else’s shoes’ leads to good but it isn’t quite as simple as this.
With varying definitions and types of empathy, let’s settle on the Oxford English Dictionary definition:
Empathy was a term coined by an English psychologist called Edward Titchener, taken from the German word Einfühlung (“feeling-into”). Ultimately, it’s about understanding another person’s true feelings and perspective.
Hopefully, if we can be empathetic towards another person, we can then use that knowledge and understanding to help that person. We can respond to their feelings in an appropriate way. However, we are not always led into positive action.
Why?
Empathy has a dark side, it is biased. It can make us choose sides. If empathy was money, it would be the currency of bias.
An associate professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, Helen Reiss states in a research article, ‘The Science of Empathy’, that medical student’s level of empathy declines throughout their training. Reiss acknowledges that ultimately having just emotional empathy is not enough.
“Cognitive empathy must play a role when a lack of emotional empathy exists because of racial, ethnic, religious, or physical differences.”
We can define cognitive empathy as the ability to take the true perspective of another person whereas emotional empathy (sometimes referred to as affective empathy) is quite literally feeling and sharing the same emotions as another.
Reiss states that cognitive empathy is so vital because of the way we’ve evolved. In a nutshell, it’s a lot easier for us to emotionally share, have affective empathy, for people who are like us.
“Affective empathy, or emotional sharing, most easily occurs among members of the same tribe”
We see this tribalism all the time, even in our everyday lives. As a white, privileged, middle class male, it’s extremely easy for me to feel the pain of someone who is also white and grew up in Oxford. Far easier than it is to feel the pain of a Syrian refugee — even though their situation is clearly a whole lot worse. It’s my unconscious bias which has allowed me to turn off the 6 O’clock news for the entirety of my life with often the same thought — “that’s terrible”, as I make my way to the fridge.
Whilst it’s not healthy to have our empathy ‘switched on’ all the time, we’d go insane if it was, the effects of empathetic bias are far-reaching and can be severe. We’re seeing it in America right now: the so-called ‘land of the free’ where racism continues to fracture communities and cost lives. Most recently, the life of George Floyd which was taken by a white police officer. I urge you to read this thought-provoking, factual and data-driven article which explores why Floyd’s death is just a single episode in the devaluation of black lives.
Whilst no one single issue is ever responsible for a situation, I want to step back for a moment and look at this issue through the lens of empathy.
I do not believe the police officer lacks empathy — I am sure he is empathic towards his own family — it is that he lacks empathy for those different to himself. We’ve already heard that empathetic bias is an innate human trait — we find it easier to empathise with people who are similar to us. . Whilst empathy is an incredibly useful skill, it can also be dangerous, causing us to subconsciously (or even consciously) put people in groups. This empathy bias fuels our inability to connect and care for others who are different from ourselves, and without intervention, will continue to fuel all kinds of hate across the world. Reiterating Reiss’s concerns with medical students; when there is disconnection between people because of race, ethnicity, culture, whatever it may be — cognitive empathy must be activated.
So how do we ensure society overcomes this empathetic bias — how do we develop our empathy for good?
The issue of police brutality towards ethic minorities is a complex problem and not one I have the answers to. And whilst empathy on it’s own will not solve the deeply complex issues we see in our world — increasing the level of it (cognitively as well as emotionally) will help drive people into positive action. Whether that’s lobbying government, putting pressure on politicians, campaigning and bringing together communities around a cause, speaking out.
The first step forward towards a more civil and empathic society is to admit that we’re tribal, that we’re born racist. We need to realise that we all live in our own bubble, that we are scientifically wired to be biased and that empathy is tribal. It’s important to not use this as an excuse for our actions but as fuel to consciously change our behaviour for the better.
To be truly empathetic we must accept it’s a skill we have to work on.
There are many ways to develop empathy. Minter Dial, author of ‘Heartificial Empathy’, mentions 5 in his a blog post but I will focus on just two:
- Listen intensely and with intent
Ultimately, it’s about shutting up, offering time and listening. We are all ‘busy’ all of the time but if you stop to really hear someone. If you listen to someone without an allotment of time you will find you learn a lot more. Becoming a great listener is possible and it will strengthen your emotional intelligence and perspective. Listening to audiobooks, podcasts and radio programmes is another fantastic way to practise. After all, listening is about educating ourselves but it has to be a conscious effort.
Returning to the example of the police officer who killed George Floyd, how much time did he spend in the communities he served, listening to people and hearing their stories? Asking how their day is? Finding out how their community could be bettered and what he and his colleagues could do to help? Did he in any way, try to gain the perspective of the people he is meant to protect and not harm — my guess is no, he did not.
2. Actively seek ‘un-likeminded’ people and communities
It’s easy for us to spend time with people we are similar to. It’s easy to empathise. By seeking out opportunities with un-likeminded people we are broadening our perspective.
For me, over the past few years, that’s been speaking to and spending time with people living on the street. Whether that’s in the UK, at the Homeless World Cup in Mexico and Cardiff or working alongside Slum Soccer in India. A stand out moment though was spending a night and a couple of days in a squat 2 years ago in London, being curious and asking questions — whilst remaining respectful (sometimes people don’t want to share and that’s OK too).
In this time of Covid-19 it’s going to be harder to gain new perspectives in person but luckily social media exists. Fight against your algorithm, search for a viewpoint, a hashtag you disagree with, not to change your mind, but to try and understand why someone thinks the opposite to you. Study them, research why they have that viewpoint, empathise with them. You will be wiser and even better equipped to argue your beliefs with greater effect.
Flex your muscles
Like a muscle, empathy exists naturally, but to be strengthened. It must be exercised and practiced, or it will wither. It has to be a conscious effort on our part to work on the skill of empathy. Alone, empathy won’t solve the issues discussed in this blog; that will take a lot more, including immense policy reform. But, by developing our own empathy skills, we can become more active as citizens and build stronger, more resilient communities rooted in action — isn’t that a world we all want to live in?
Empathy.
If you dedicate time to it. If you make it your mission to get a little bit better at it. You may just see your personal and professional life shift for the better and if everyone makes that conscious choice, the world may make a shift too.
If you enjoyed this blog, learnt something new or it simply made you think please do consider sharing or giving it a clap (you can clap up to 50 times — it really helps).
For free school resources that help young people practice and develop the skill of empathy please visit www.empathy-week.com
#empathy #leadership #bias #unconsciousbias #listen #empathygeneration #Georgefloyd #theempathyinstinct
